The House By The Cemetery

Well this, right off the bat, seems to be a great welcome back movie. Directed by the great Lucio Fulci. This film is on the Pure Terror 50 Movie Pack, From what I read, this film is about a family who moves into a house that has a psycho in the basement. At least that's what I gathered so far. Pretty excited, I love Fulci and I love Italian Horror films. In general Italy has some of the best horror movies I've ever seen. Anywho, review should be up in a couple hours after I finish the movie.

IMDb: The House by the Cemetery 

Review:

This is my second time writing this review, the first time Firefox went tits up. For some reason it wouldn't let me revert to that draft I had prior, but whatever. I liked this movie it had a lot of good in it, coupled with some bad (mostly nit-picks).However, the biggest mistake was quite possibly the biggest Film faux pas ever. So let's hop to it!

PROS:

Oh So Much Gore!: I don't even know what to say here, the gore is fantastic. Throat Ripping, Knife through Head, Throat Slicing, Be-Heading Bleeding Mannequins (?). It's absolutely beautiful, in a gruesome terrible kind of way.

 

Throat Slicing

 Knife Through Head

 Throat Ripping

 I know, this just looks like bad special effects, but I assure you, that was a mannequin.

Dr. Freudstein's A BOSS: I mean, not only does he have like the coolest costume ever (come on he looks like a member of Slipknot) but he rips peoples throats out. On a scale of 1 to Badass, I would say Throat Ripping would come in at Badass on the scale. Let's get the obvious out of the way, a mash between Sigmund Freud and Frankenstein, at least name-wise. All I can say is that he looks like a massive badass.

 I take my prior comment back, he looks cooler than the members of Slipknot.

CONS:

Dub: The first time I did this I wrote a really long thing here, this time I will give the abridged version. Kids shouldn't be called Bob, at least not constantly. Don't run around your house yelling Bob when looking for your son, all I can think of is some sweaty fat guy jumping out. Bob just isn't a fitting name to call your kid here's some better names: Kid, Bobby, Son, Robbie, Robby, Dobby, Shithead, Shitspawn, Devilchild. It's just seems so impersonal, like her son was a passing acquaintance, not a blood relative, let alone her son.

 Nice bowl cut Bob!

Deus Ex Machina: God from the Machine. Spoiler Alert (kinda). So the kid is trapped in a basement with Dr. Freudstein. He is absolutely screwed, his mother was trying to open a crack in a tomb door thing for them to get through. However, she was to weak. She is killed by Freudstein. So young Bob is still trying to get out through there when Freudstein grabs his leg and begins pulling him away. Are you ready for this... A litte girl, the ghost of Freudstein's Daughter, pulls the tomb open far enough and pulls Bob out, rescuing him. Deus Ex Machina, while used in several films and plays is still seen as a serious faux pas.

FINAL SCORE:

8/10

This movie was well done, however, it did have some slight issues. I really wish I could give this movie a 10. I just can't it has some flaws that just kind of detract from it's beauty. I would recommend this movie to everyone though whole-heartedly. Especially if you like gore.

Purchase "The House By The Cemetery":

Amazon: DVD & Blu-Ray

Oldies

 Pure Terror 50 Movie Pack

P.S. I just want to say that I really enjoyed watching this movie and writing this review, I'm happy to be back and hopefully I can stick it out for quite a while longer this time. I'll talk to you guys tomorrow.

-Dylan